Monday, December 6, 2010

Lindsay Lohan To Get Back On The Streets

No, Not Tricking...Driving

Lindsay Lohan

Recently fired, Hollywood trainwreck, Lindsay Lohan, is set to hit the streets again, but not as a hooker on Hollywood and Vine (cause I know that's what you were thinking). Someone at the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) clearly drank too much eggnog and removed the restrictions from Lohan's driver's license, after years of legal trouble, due to DUI incidents (Driving Under the Influence).

Los Angeles motorists were seen upping their insurance policies in reaction to the negative news. Lohan must be working for Geico to drive motorists into getting more insurance out of sheer fear. There's no other explanation for this.

Previously, drug addict and alcoholic, Lohan, in separate incidents, crashed into unsuspecting shrubs, ran over the foot of an innocent passenger and hit the pram (stroller) of a toddler that was being pushed across the street by her nanny at a red light. Flashing red in front of Lindsay is like flashing a red flag in front of a bull. To them it doesn't mean stop - it means go. In closing, Los Angeles motorists may also want to invest in helmets.

Side Bar: How is Lohan getting car insurance with her driving record. It would be cheaper to make the next Star Wars movie or clear up the national deficit.

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