Movie Review: The Bling Ring

Title: The Bling Ring

Year Of Release: 2013

Review Date: May 31, 2013

Rating: R

Running time: 90 minutes

Box Office Gross: $15,553,563

Site Rating: 7 out of 10 stars

"The Bling Ring" is based on the true story of a group of people who broke into the homes of Hollywood stars. The rash of burglaries that occurred were mostly concentrated on mansions in the Hollywood Hills sections of Los Angeles, home to many celebrities. Among the victims of the Bling Ring were Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Megan Fox, Orlando Bloom and wife Miranda Kerr.

Lindsay Lohan was particularly upset by the burglaries, but as she has a habit of stealing things from many people and stores, it was just desserts. For a time, some wondered if Lohan was involved in the Bling Ring, as she had given a thief access to a Los Angeles mansion in another incident, where valuable property was stolen, some of which was found in her possession. She returned it and apologized.

Though breaking an entry is a felony, as is stealing valuable possessions of others exceeding $500 in value, parts of this movie was unintentionally funny. For example, when police began arresting members of the Bling Ring, one in particular, Nicki Moore (real name Alexis Neiers) played by actress Emma Watson, started semi-crying for her mommy. I’m sorry, but I laughed during this part of the film. Committing crimes like they’re big and bad, but when the cops show up to bust them it's, "I want my mommy" time is hysterical.

Members of the Bling Ring were sentenced to 1-4 four years behind bars. However, Neiers was sentenced to one year and only served one month in jail, due to overcrowding in Los Angeles jails. Members of the Bling Ring, such as masterminds Nick Prugo and Rachel Lee served more time in prison, due to having been sentenced to four-years behind bars. Hopefully their stint behind bars will keep the entire Bling Ring out of trouble.

The ironic thing about the Bling Ring is they were taking cues from some of the pop culture celebrities they robbed. Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are very materialistic and have stolen other people's property. Both women have gotten involved in shady business dealings, some of which landed them in civil court, to support their vain lifestyles, while branding themselves successful business women (which neither of them are in any fashion). This is the template they and others in their set have given impressionable people to follow. Then, they were victimized by their own villainy and greed courtesy of the Bling Ring.
 

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Movie Review - Jack The Giant Slayer

Title: Jack The Giant Slayer

Year Of Release: 2013

Review Date: July 31, 2013

Rating: PG-13

Running time: 96 minutes

Box Office Gross: $197,687,603

Site Rating: 6 out of 10 stars

Jack The Giant Slayer is a fantasy film based on the children's tale "Jack And The Beanstalk." The big budget film ringing in at a  $200,000,000 price tag, made $197,687,603 at the box office, which was considered a disappointment under the circumstances.

The film centers on Jack, a peasant, who meets Princess Isabelle, after rescuing her from a dangerous situation. Shortly after he is given a pouch of magic beans by a mysterious man, with the warning that he was not to get them wet and he does, then trouble ensues. The magic beans sprout into a beanstalk that leads to another world of vicious, unfortunate looking giants who are cannibals.

Some of the scenes in this film are quite gory and gross, especially the cannibal cooking scene. As stated above, the film was quite expensive, but there was still missing elements. Overall, the cast was good, but the stand out actor in this film is Ewan McGregor, who put in a commanding performance.

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Movie Review - Vehicle 19

Title: Vehicle 19

Year Of Release: 2013

Review Date: July 31, 2013

Rating: R

Running time: 85 minutes

Box Office Gross: N/A

Site Rating: 4 out of 10 stars

"Vehicle 19" is the action drama starring actor Paul Walker, who plays an ex-convict named "Michael" who visits South Africa to see his girlfriend. He picks up his rental car, but the paperwork doesn't match, as an employee gave him the wrong vehicle. This is where his nightmare begins.

Spoiler Alert: Michael finds a gun and mobile phone in the car and shortly after, a woman who has been bound and gagged. The woman, Rachel Shabangu, is a South African prosecutor who has been kidnapped for uncovering a sex trafficking ring, targeting underage women and adult females. After some conflict, he rushes to get her to a judge to tell her story, but is chased the entire way by corrupt law enforcement trying to stop them.

"Vehicle 19" was an interesting film. In starts off somewhat quietly, but has many twists and turns along the way and a few surprises. It is not an airheaded film, too superficial to appreciate. However, it could have done without the profane language to reach a wider audience.

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Movie Review: Thunderstruck

Title: Thunderstruck

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: January 31, 2013

Rating: G

Running time: 94 minutes

Box Office Gross: N/A 

   Site Rating: 6 out of 10 stars

Thunderstruck is the funny, entertaining basketball comedy starring NBA star Kevin Durant. Due to a freak occurrence, Durant loses his basketball abilities to a teenage boy, who takes full advantage of it. Durant, who is first unaware of why his game has gone bad, comically struggles to regain his basketball abilities, providing some of the best laughs in the film.

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Movie Reviews: Ted

Title: Ted

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: January 31, 2013

Rating: R

Running time: 106 minutes

Box Office Gross: $515,015,487

   Site Rating: 1 out of 10 stars

"Ted" has got to be one of the crudest, most disgusting films I have ever seen. Originally it was sold as a slightly off the wall comedy about a boy and his mouthy teddy bear as they grow up. However, the movie is filthy, sacrilegious and mocks the disabled. It features scenes such as the teddy bear Ted having sex with a woman, which is sick.

In another scene the foul mouthed teddy bear, who works in a grocery store, brags to his boss, he violated a woman with a cucumber, then sold the vegetable to the public - a family of four with kids. It never ceases to amaze me how many lines some in Hollywood will cross when making movies, in trying to be shocking and irreverent. 

Movie Review: Fire With Fire

Title: Fire With Fire

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: January 31, 2013

Rating: G

Running time: 97 minutes

Box Office Gross: N/A 

   Site Rating: 2 out of 10 stars

"Fire With Fire" is a very violent action drama about a firefighter, Jeremy, who is pursued by a terrible, racist gangster, Hagan, as he witnessed the death of a black father and son. As Jeremy tries to protect himself, Hagan begins targeting the people in his life, in a brutal crime spree. This movie has far too much violence and of a very graphic nature, to be enjoyed. It's just too much and it swallows up the storyline.

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Movie Review: The Dark Knight Rises

Title: The Dark Knight Rises

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: February 28, 2013

Rating: R

Running time: 135 minutes

Box Office Gross: $1,081,041,287

   Site Rating: 4 out of 10 stars

I did not like this film at all and largely due to the Colorado theatre massacre it inspired. "The Dark Knight Rises" is a dark, tedious film with a convoluted storyline. Bruce Wayne, also known as Batman, is again engaged in battle against those seeking to destroy him. This time around the villain is Bane, a masked madman determined to destroy Gotham City. This film dragged too much for my taste and is quite morbid.

Movie Review: The Bourne Legacy

Title: The Bourne Legacy

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: February 28, 2013

Rating: R

Running time: 135 minutes

Box Office Gross: $276,144,750

   Site Rating: 4 out of 10 stars

"The Bourne Legacy" is the fourth film in the franchise which originally starred Matt Damon as Jason Bourne, a former soldier given medicine which gave him increased strength. The latest Bourne film stars Jeremy Renner in the same role Damon once occupied. 

Rachel Weisz and Jeremy Renner in "The Bourne Legacy"

"The Bourne Legacy" is a continuation of the same, with Bourne remaining in hiding, whilst trying to unravel what has been done to him, via the medicines he has been repeatedly given by the government, who are now out to get him. "The Bourne Legacy" is a very violent film with a story line that meanders too much, taking away from parts of its message.

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Movie Review: Pitch Perfect

 

Title: Pitch Perfect

Year Of Release: 2012

Review Date: February 28, 2013

Rating: PG-13

Running time: 112 minutes

Box Office Gross: $108,997,015

   Site Rating: 3 out of 10 stars

"Pitch Perfect" is the gross out acappella comedy about a group of university students with a penchant for singing cheesy pop songs without musical accompaniment. While many of the singing voices in the film were up to scratch, the characters were all kinds of nutty. This film scared me and it wasn't even a horror movie - due to the cheesy singing and dancing.

The groups vie to win the national singing competition held in New York. "Pitch Perfect" does have its funny moments, the funniest being the Tonechangers performance. However, the crude sexual references and situations also limited the film's audience.

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Movie Review: His And Her Christmas

Title: His And Her Christmas

Year Of Release: 2005

Review Date: November 30, 2012

Rating: PG

Running Time: 90 minutes

Box Office Gross: N/A

Site Rating: 5 out of 10 stars

"His And Her Christmas" is a movie about rival columnists competing for readers in San Francisco, California. Tom Lane is the good looking, slick, superficial columnist, who brings in a decent salary. Lane's rival Liz Madison is a cynical columnist at a small newspaper, who struggles to get readers, until one day she begins writing articles the public takes to in a big way...

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Movie Review: Puss In Boots

Title: Puss In Boots

Year Of Release: 2011

Review Date: May 31, 2012

Rating: G

Running time: 90 minutes

Box Office Gross: $554,709,226

Site Rating: 3 out of 10 stars

"Puss In Boots" is the animated tale of a cat that is falsely accused of theft and ends up on the run. His longtime friend Humpty Dumpty, a greed thief, gets him into trouble causing a rift in their friendship.

"Puss In Boots" dragged at points, causing grown viewers to lose interest at times. Some of the jokes were too sophisticated for the film's target audience of kids, who probably did not get some of the humor. The film was warm, but at times the storyline was not cohesive.

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