Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Kirstie Alley - The Xenu Is With You

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Kirstie Alley Chokes On "Dancing With The Stars"...Again

Apparently, Kirstie Alley, the Xenu believing Scientologist, had another mishap on the television dance competition "Dancing With The Stars." Last week, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, took one for Mother Russia, as he and dance partner Alley collapsed in the middle of their routine...crashing to the floor....on national television...during a show seen by millions.


The Chokeage From Last Week

This week, Maks tossed Alley across the dance floor like a boomerang, only she didn't come back like she was supposed to. Where was Kirstie, you ask? Well, she slid forward, but her shoe simply said "no" and broke like Lindsay Lohan in a field of weed (no, weed, not weeds).

Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy

As Maks spun around, like a graceful Russian swan, he noticed Kirstie on the floor, feverishly trying to fix her shoe that had flown off, like they were in the middle of the decompressed cabin of a 747. He simply grinned (you know the kind of grin where you can see all of a person's teeth) and you could sort of tell he was thinking "Payback for last week, witch!"

Of course, me being the sensitive and caring blogger I am, laughed and laughed and laughed (like last week when they fell). Never let it be said I'm unsympathetic to other people's problems. Next week, I fully expect Kirstie to land in the bandstand.

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